Life After Stroke
from Stroke Survivor and Author Erica Tucci

Erica Tucci had a full life. She was a corporate manager of a Fortune 500 company, an alternative healing arts business owner and an author of three books.

In June 2011 Erica had a stroke that left her completely paralyzed on her right side.

Life after stroke for Erica has so far included more than three years of recovery through both conventional and alternative healing therapy.

Katherine T Owen:
Erica, you talk in your book about how in your life after stroke you have been interested in asking Why? You believe that identifying the stroke cause assists your alternative healing journey.
In looking for the cause of the stroke, did you ever fall into the trap of self blame?

Erica Tucci:
No, I didn’t really blame myself, per se. But, I do believe in karma, so I do feel that having a stroke was something I may have created in my life.

To put things into perspective, my stroke was caused by a physical hole in my heart that allowed a blood clot to pass through and land in my brain. Two years before my stroke, I had a past-life regression that showed me as a showgirl dancing on stage (fascinating that I was a ballet dancer in my current life!).

As I watched myself performing, I noticed a gaping hole where the dancer’s heart was (a symbolic hole, so to speak). Maybe if I had paid more attention to that regression experience and to the frequent heart flutter I had in my current life, I would have had my heart checked and could have avoided the stroke. But as it is, I had the stroke and although it has been a difficult journey, I feel in my life after stroke I am a better person because of all that I have learned from it.

Katherine T Owen:
Have you found any gifts in suffering? Is life after stroke better for you in any way?
And, so as to give a grounded response for the readers, can you talk about any frustrations due to physical disability caused by the stroke?

Erica Tucci:
First, I’ll talk about the frustrations caused by physical disabilities.

Yes, it has been frustrating to be limited to what I can do by my disability, to remember all that I used to do, especially taking salsa and zumba classes.

But I feel I will fully heal over time and believe that I will be able to resume my dance classes. In fact, I plan on returning to ballet lessons as part of my continued rehab because it will help retrain my muscles to work like they did before. I am fortunate to still have a lot of strength and flexibility from my years of ballet training (nothing that we do in our lives is for naught!).

Feel your feelings

The emotions, whatever they are should never be ignored. Instead, allow them to run their course and play themselves out. If you have to shed a few tears or even if you have a deluge, it’s OK. If you have fits of anger, it’s OK! Just be sure not to hurt anything or anyone, including yourself. Instead, how about grabbing a pillow and screaming into it? It works wonders!

Now, “how is life better for you?” Oh my gosh, it is better in so many ways.

I feel that my stroke was a gift from the heavens for what I have learned. It has taught me what is really important in life:

• In my life after stroke I have gained stronger, deeper relationships with myself, with my Higher Self and with others INSTEAD OF material things and outer recognition.
  That doesn’t mean I don’t like having material things or receiving recognition for my accomplishments. It’s just that they don’t have as much importance as relationships anymore.
• I have greater self-love that radiates outward to others and embraces them with that love.
• I have moved from the “what’s in it for me?” mindset to a “how can I serve others?” consciousness. 
• I have learned to pace myself and allow myself to “stop and smell the roses” and connect with nature as opposed to always racing on the treadmill of life and getting caught in the frenzy.
• Also, living in the moment instead of the past or future is so important, since the present moment is really all that we have. I enjoy every moment as much as I can. We never know from one minute to the next what can happen. I certainly didn’t think I was going to have a stroke!
• Finally, I now live by the mantra “believe in yourself and watch the miracle unfold.”
  I aim to have faith in myself as co-creator of my life with Spirit (God, our Creator,  Allah - however you define the Higher Power).

Katherine T Owen:
'Never Giving Up' is a chapter heading in your book.
How important is this attitude in healing from a stroke? In your life after stroke, is perseverance a quality you continue to need? And if so, in what ways?

Erica Tucci:
In hard times, there will always be those instances where you just want to “throw in the towel” and give up. But I feel that giving up is NOT an option.

Perseverance and fortitude can make you a stronger, better person than before your ordeal. It shows that you love yourself enough that you WANT to live your life to its fullest, in spite of any trauma you are faced with.

I have always been one to persevere in my life (which I learned from my parents), and have worked hard during my rehabilitation so I can fully heal.

HOWEVER, perseverance hasn’t been just about working hard in physical therapy rehabilitation.
For me, the most difficult challenge has been to surrender and let go and let GOD. It’s been about having total faith that the Higher Power will help heal my body…that I DON’T have to do it alone.